I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
The last thing I remember saying was "Tequila for all!!"
If you count the sounds from the room down the hall....that was definitely NOT the last thing that came out of your mouth.
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
Randomize
