Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
We are all done wearing pants today
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
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