I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
Like how hard is it to come up to me with chocolate and wine and say "hey, you're beautiful. Wanna marathon Doctor Who in sweatpants?" Hell yes!
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
Randomize
