talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
if a CSI technician examined our hotel room with a black light he'd think we hit the Pulse button a DNA blender without a lid
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
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