Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
I literally paid cover, got kicked out. Tried to explain that I was just clumsy, but mispronounced it. Then I got pissed off, stormed out..and clotheslined myself on a velvet rope. How was your night?
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
Personally, if my roommate had a nice friend who made me dinner, gave me free beer, a 4am meal, a couch to sleep on in an apartment on the beach, and breakfast when I woke up, and I found out that said roommate was fucking her, I'd be all... right on! She's cool! Thanks for the quesadillas!
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
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