Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
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