can you have the cops turn on the gps locator on my phone...i just woke up in a Hooters uniform and I have no idea where I am...
He is such a slut. More and more my type.
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
just woke up face down in my kitchen covered in cheetos. my mom just stepped over me to get to the coffee maker. hello summer
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
TO ALL WHO WERE IN MY HOUSE LAST NIGHT: WHOEVER STOLE MY BONG AND PUT IT ON THE ROOF WILL BE PAYING MY HOSPITAL BILL FROM LAST NIGHT.. AND BUYING ME A NEW, SWEETER BONG.
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
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