My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
My little brother came home while I was sitting there icing my vagina with a bag of peas. Asshole looks at me, high fives Ryan, then leaves.
My ex boyfriend literally just asked "who needs porn?". This is EXACTLY why I dumped his ass.
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
Randomize
