how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
I'm at work, and just realized I the beer smell I keep getting random whiffs of is my bra. I fail at life.
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
I think drunk me saved him in my phone as "beautiful man" to play a joke on sober me
Randomize
