I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
He called his prostate his "boner button".
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
I might have snap chatted him. So here's what I need you to do. Find him. Abduct him. Get his phone. View the chat so he can't. Then, buy him ice cream. He deserves ice cream.
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
I've Ubered to the bar three times this weekend to get my car but every time I get there I end up drinking. Still no car.
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
Randomize
