I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
And then my hands went numb and no one believed me so I started putting peoples cigarettes out on them. Shitty idea i'll tell you that much
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
Ryan. I woke up. At the neighbors house. And by the neighbors. I mean the ones to the north. The ones that hate us. Please call me. I am so confused and you are gone
At the neighbors house?! Like in it or outside???
In it on the fucking couch. No idea how i got here.
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
Randomize
