the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
Never again will I go to my mom's side of the family's parties. After the bride and groom cut the head off the roasted pig together they boarded their RV and rode off into the sunset.
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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