theres bread in your mailbox im going to eat it
nevermind its newpaper
A university police officer just hhigh fived me when i drunkenly stumbled into Aderhold. Fucking 5 o'clock somewhere.ITS IN CASABLANCA RIGHT NOW! TIME ZONES!
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
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