Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
Randomize
