New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
My parking ticket this morning was 30bucks. I feel like I'm paying the city to fuck you.
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
Highlight of the day: realizing the man in the car next to mine was getting road head... at 2:45pm... nicely done sir, nicely done.
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
Why did I just find out you and Andrew had sex right next to my face when I passed out on the beach?
At the time it seemed romantic and its also extremely frowned down upon to leave a passed out person by themselves in an unfamiliar place.
Why did I wake up by myself then?
I think we r still a few steps from ex sex. In fact, that's never going to happen. I'm just saying on the seething-chemical-fire-of-emotional-distress-to-post -relationship-intercourse scale, I'm closer to fucking than throttling. Progress is fun.
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
I tried to think of the best possible thing I could do for my 30th birthday, and the finalist is "get a clit ring"
Randomize
