your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
Any particular reason you put 2 smashed up limes in my back pocket last night?
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
you are never too drunk for berry picking
they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
Randomize
