shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
I am eating a fluff-a-nutter sandwich at the gym right now. I brought vodka too.
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
Randomize
