dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
Either I'm drunk or judge Judy has 3D commercials...so I think I'm drunk. Also I may or may not haven eaten a hoagie on the toilet when I didn't want to stand up
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
I think you're overestimating how drunk I was
You said your pillow felt like the ocean...
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
Randomize
