Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
If I don't at least start a parade that spirals into drunken riots then I'm calling it a fail of a birthday
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
I tried to feed the cat bread. I told her it was the body of Christ. That seemed to work.
You don't have a cat...
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
I just passed a lady driving with a cat in a sweater sitting on her lap with its paws on the steering wheel
Only you....
I tried saying sorry but instead I puked down her shirt and tried to clean it up... Now I have a bruise on my forehead. good news, before she left she wrote her number on my stomach with sharpie
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