I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
There is a semi-attractive guy at the door who's looking for you. Says he met you on Chatroulette. Start explaining NOW.
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
Don't get into any trouble on your trip
The only foreseeable trouble would be pregnancy, but I gotta be sterile otherwise I'm beating some pretty fucking incredible odds
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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