somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
Then we managed to set a grill and all 24lbs of meat on it on fire. I didn't help because I was filled with alcohol and extra flammable.
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
Why is your signature on my underwear?
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
I woke up at 2 AM to find them in my living room with a radio flyer wagon full of milk glass plates and a Holstein cow. How am I going to explain this to my landlord!?!
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