We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
the night ended with taco bell and tears
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
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