Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
I butt dialed her mom while cheating on her. Needless to say Christmas will be awkward.
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
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