the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
figured you should hear this from me. Your refrigerator door is way broken. I opened it last night when i was drunk and tried to climb the shelves. i got to the one with the mustard.
I left his apartment Bc I lost my id. Wandered 5 miles barefoot. Got lost in downtown la. My phone died so I asked for directions from a man at the gas station.. Turns out he was a bum. He led me back to the apartment AND he found my id.
It's like the whiskey god was watching over you
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
mom is telling me the setting in which I was conceived
did you know we used to have a pool?
I just gargled with NyQuil
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
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