At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
i took my goldfish out of his bowl last night and put him in my bed
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
No one wants to start their day off with bloody lemons and a tampon in the toilet. Wtf.
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
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