im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
The best part about passing out on the floor was the fact that when I pissed myself, I didn't piss the bed again.
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
The bartender has no bra and is giving out free shots. Call mom I'm getting married.
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
I was all, oh. I've had tattoos and broken a limb. Waxing my lady parts will be a cake walk. I was wrong.
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
Randomize
