so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
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