He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
nothing says happy new years better than a black eye from shooting yourself with a champagne bottle
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
Do you remember trying to use a pencil, pen, and sunglasses as your second form of ID at the bar when they wouldn't let you in last night?
Sorry, not ignoring you.. We broke open the other piñata left from cinco de mayo and it was filled with condoms, mini booze bottles, and those little party horn things you blow into. You'll forgive me when we're fucking for days with all these free condoms.
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
Hey, you remember years ago when you told me you would give me a kidney?
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
did you just send me my own nude
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
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