ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
i should start naming my morning wood
great idea but wrong number
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
are you listening to the theme from Jurassic Park whilst pooping?
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
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