It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
Like if there was an award for best way to take a girls virginity, he would get a standing ovation. And first prize. Probably a bunch of roses too. That good.
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
Tiny.
I mean tony. It's like autocorrect knows he wasn't well endowed.
Doc gave me something stronger than Xanax. The pills have your last name imprinted on them. This cannot be coincidence.
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
Randomize