Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
Thank you for holding my bra last night while i did a topless lap around the house
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
He bought segways. We ride them when we get drunk. Last night he ran through the sliding glass door.
Someone just knocked jenga into a plate of cake. I'm licking off each piece one by one.
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
Because you failed to stop the wedding, now I have to be a homewrecker. My eternal damnation is on your head I hope you're proud.
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
It's your last night of vacation right? Be the Oprah of dick. And you get a dick... and you get a dick, and you get a dick!!!
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
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