He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
A guy just tried to send me a pic of his penis & my phone sent me a disclaimer saying "the components were unsuitable for your terminal"
Even your phone knows you shouldn't sleep with him...
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
She could makes a perfectt roast dinner drunk but she nearly sets the kitchen alight microwaving popcorn.
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
Randomize
