I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
a cabby told me that vodka is the coors light of liquor, and then gave me his number
I wonder if she thought to herself "I'm gonna sleep with that guy tonight" when she watched me puke on the bar at 3 in the afternoon?
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
soo... how was my night?
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
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