I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
today i learned why jack sparrow loved rum so fucking much
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
Seriously why is the deadbolt locked. This is the second time I'm having to sleep on the porch using my boots as my pillow. I can't wait till the next time your drunk.
Shhh, I'm sleeping. Just let it happen Jess.
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
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