how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
the maid of honor just got in a fight with the mother of the bride at a gas station across the street. best. wedding. ever.
They found an open window, climbed through and proceeded to arrest half the party. These campus cops are like fucking ninjas.
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
I just don't think it's that outlandish to ask that I don't get messages from my husband at 8:30pm on a Wednesday telling me he peed on our cat
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
Randomize
