they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
Dude. My cat just tried to bat the tampon string hanging from body. NOT COOL, SEYMOUR. NOT COOL.
The guy had great intentions when throwing us free beer off the balcony... but of course I was the one to get hit in the face because that's the kind of luck I have
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
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