i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
i didn't realize we were even dating until i ran out of weed
What a dumb baby whore.
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
Wait, you seriously DON'T keep vodka in your backpack??!??!?
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
Randomize
