But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
I just woke up from quarter beer tuesdays wearing 3 pairs of underwear, none of which are the ones I left wearing...2 Around my waist and one around my shoulder in an attempt at a bra. At least drunk me tries to be decent?
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
Randomize
