I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
People in love make me want to vomit
i just looked at my contacts and realized i saved the pizza hut girl's number as "fckucin pizza" the other night.
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
I'M NOT EVEN STOPPING FOR WINE SO I CAN GET TO THAT DICK QUICKER.
Randomize
