tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
Randomize
