Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
An accidental pregnancy to a guy with a trustfund is no mistake. It is a gift from god.
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
Randomize
