There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
I got tired of walking to the bathroom that I decided to throw up in a cup. I now have 3 cups full of vomit on top of my mini fridge
So I decided to start saving money for my abortion in a tomato sauce jar because it says ‘Prego.’ I know I thought it was fucking genius!
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
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