He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
The awkward moment when you're leaving the most attractive guy you've ever been with and you're trying not to shit on yourself. Fucking welcome to my life
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
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