On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
btw you left your chapstick on the nightstand and bruises on my body...
gifts from me to you. you're welcome.
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
Randomize
