Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
they just named my boobs. Lefty is "Guenevere" and Righty is "I claim this boob for America"
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
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