I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
I just told her she was a heartbeat above a blowup doll.
I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
How did I pull off convincing everyone that my name is Dad? Maybe they were just distracted by my boobs.
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
Dude I woke up with a handprint shaped bruise on my ass, a pong ball in my cleavage, and somebody else's gold chain around my neck. Who's house am I in?
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
Randomize