I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
God doesn't care if you're a paramedic, you can't do that to someones cat and still get into heaven
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
Just woke up to the cat unconscious on my stomach, his face between my tits, purring to bring down the walls. I'm endeared and horrified at the same time.
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
Randomize
