Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
one might say we're banned from that church
I'm going to get a baby outfit made and send it to her that says: "My husband fucked his subordinate and all I got was another baby".
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
I just realised I've never been sober in my apartment
#1- I went to button my shirt only to find they were all mising. #2- I'm so fu@king sore I feel like I was sweating to the oldies all night. #3- this pounding headache I have, I blame solely on Jennifer. Everyone sounds like Billy Mays when they talk. I remember nothing from last night, I'm concerned.
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
This Asian instant coffee I found in ur kitchen is like crack. Who knew I could feel my heart beating in my asshole after one cup of this happiness.
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
Randomize
