he is naked. in. my. bed. happiest day. of my. LIFE.
You know its been a rough night when you wake up and the first thing you remember is your mom going skinny dipping.
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
Was having a panic attack, but I'm out of xanax. Substituting with vodka shots and breathing exercises. My therapist will be proud, yes?
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your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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