Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
I woke up at 4am on the couch with half my clothes on. And by half my clothes I mean my earrings.
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
walk of shame into the pharmacy with a busted up chin and laughing the lady at the counter rolled her eyes at me when I asked for the morning after pill.
I just found scrambled eggs in my shower. Thanks for that, asshole.
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
Randomize
